November.. A Little Closer to Winter

I woke up this morning with extreme anxiety.. I didn't want to get out of bed, I didn't want to go outside and look at the snow we were supposed to wake up too. This is so unlike me, I love snow. I love everything about snow, especially the first major snowfalls.  Snow always meant winter, which meant snowboarding, which meant my season was approaching. Then it hit me, I subconsciously had anxiety because I knew there was no competitive snowboard season for me this winter, or ever again. I admit, I cried for a little.. more like a lot.  But crying is okay, crying is healing.  Instead of being in denial of my emotions and my life change this coming winter, I choose to accept it.  I choose to accept that I had a life threatening injury then made me end my dreams of pursuing a career in snowboarding, I choose to let myself feel ANY emotions it wants to feel, but most importantly, I accept a new life for myself, whatever that may be.  I am alive and healthy, and right now, that is what matters.  I am happy, but I will become happier.  Maybe my life has something even better in store for me than the Olympics, and I cannot wait to life this new journey to there.